pastorsblog

Jesus, Chocolate and a Back Rub

I am sometimes amazed at how much my tastes have changed over the years.  I remember as a child not liking spinach (although I did eat it so that I could have muscles like Popeye) and liking black olives, but not green.  I now love green olives much more than black and can almost make a meal out of them alone - much to my wife's consternation, who absolutely detests their smell.  I am most amazed, though, at how much my tastes have changed when it comes to sweets.

Any one who knew me growing up and into first 15 years or so of my adult life, knows very well that I was not a huge fan of chocolate.  As a child, I had my occasional candy bar here and there, but please, do not offer me chocolate cake or chocolate ice cream.  Chocolate desserts did not appeal to me in any way, shape or form and my choice was almost always plain old vanilla.  But time and experience have changed me.

I'm not exactly sure how it happened, but somewhere along the way, I fell in love with chocolate.  I know, some of you are saying, how could you not have loved chocolate before?  Go figure.  Maybe it wasn't really the fact that I found chocolate, but chocolate found me.  As is the case with many things in our lives, we formulate opinions and develop pre-conceived ideas based on our perceptions and experiences in life.  Once formulated, it is sometimes hard for our minds to be changed.  It could have been my father-in-law that tried to get me to try new things (like Es cargo and Calamari) and to re-try everything I said I didn't like, that brought about such a radical transformation.  Nevertheless, when it comes to chocolate, I was, as one little boy said, "bornded againded." 

So much has changed for me when it comes to chocolate that these days, when I go to the mall, after figuring out where all the coffee shops are located, the first place I look for is the Fanny May or Godiva store so I know where I can get a Truffle before I leave.  My favorite cheesecake at the Cheesecake Factory (www.thecheesecakefactory.com) is in fact, the Godiva Chocolate Cheesecake (pictured above) and my favorite at Cafe Latte (www.cafelatte.com) is their Double Chocolate Cheesecake.

This week in the small group meeting we attended, the topic was on happiness.  For the ice breaker, the question was asked, "What makes you happy?"  The group leader went around the room and allowed each adult and child to answer the question.  When he got to his 9 year-old daughter, she asked, "can I say more than one thing?"  He said that would be fine.  She began very deliberately, yet pensively as she slowly responded, "Okay...  Jesus... chocolate...  and a back rub."  Of course, the adults in the group all laughed with approval and some even said, "Amen!"  As her pastor, I said, "Now that will preach!" and told her I was going to use that sometime.

When I said before that chocolate found me, well... I'm more happy today than ever because Jesus found me and that has made all the difference.  I had some pre-conceived ideas about Him before I really met Him, but somehow, He brought me around to His way of thinking, and I am forever grateful.  I love Him now more than ever.  Like chocolate, He has become sweeter as the days have gone by and His words have become "sweeter than honey in the honeycomb."

I am still looking for that back rub, though (hopefully my wife will read this and take it to heart), but at least I have Jesus and of course, my chocolate.  And if you're looking for me this Saturday I won't be home.  I'll be the the Twin Cities Chocolate Extravaganza (www.mspchocolateshow.com) watching a friend compete, eating whatever chocolate I can find and sharing Jesus with anyone who will let me.  Now that I think about it, after walking around and standing all day, I may really need a back rub when I get home.  "Oh, Honey!......."

The Big Green Chair

I heard a man on the radio recently talking about the relationship he had with his father while growing up.  He was emphasizing the importance of a father making it a priority to communicate with his children, especially during their teenage years.  He said that when he was growing up, his father had a makeshift office in their then-unfinished basement.  It was where his father spent many hours doing much of his studying, book-keeping and away-from-the office busy work.  He remarked that, "Dad spent a lot of time in his office when he was home."  However, the part of the story that really caught my attention was what he said next. 

He went on to describe how, even though his father was very busy, there was an unwritten rule that each child in the family was very aware of.  The rule was that if any member of the family needed to talk to Dad, all they had to do was come downstairs to his office, sit in the big overstuffed, green Lazy Boy chair next to Dad's desk, and Dad would drop whatever he was doing and give them his undivided attention...  for as long as they wanted.  The man telling the story said he believed that one act gave him the much added confidence he needed to face his teenage years.  As I listened I began to wonder what would happen if all fathers (and mothers) would make communicating with their children a top priority. 

Several years ago, someone we knew was out of work and needed to sell his hot tub.  While we were not in the market for a hot tub at the time, we had always wanted one, and had some extra money from a recent refinancing, so we decided to go ahead and not only help him out, but fulfill one of our hearts desires.  I didn't realize at the time what an added benefit it would become to our family.  Since then we have spent many hours with our teenage (and now adult) children, talking about pressures at school and work, relationships with others, their life's goals and dreams and a host of other subjects.  In a way, the family hot tub became our "Dad's Green Chair."  I actually wish I had heard the green chair story years before.  I would have definitely implemented a similar rule in our family.

The point I am trying to make here (in case you've missed it so far) is that children need to talk to their parents as much as we parents, long for them to talk to us.  Finding creative ways to encourage them to do so may take some prayer and patience on your part, but trust me, it will be well worth it in the end.  It doesn't have to be a hot tub or a big green chair.  It may end up being the bench at the end your bed they sit on to tell you they're home after the end of the evening with their friends.  Wherever and whenever, be sure to take the time to listen.  These are the memories both you and they will be able to keep for the rest your lives.